Lets start at the beginning, on the dock.

Back in 1988 when I moved out to sunny California, to be close to the "nucleus" of my family,(that would be cousin Paul), I started my official crew training.

While staying in Paul's spare bedroom, I was encouraged to take a boating safety course and help with some of the boat maintenance……

THE PLAN: For my first chore Paul thought I could help he and Bill Bradley change the broken weather vane at the top of the mast. He figured I could sit in this little seat/swing with pockets, suspended by a rope, sorry, I mean line, and then be hoisted to the top of the mast. Once I arrived at the top of the mast I was to unscrew the old vane, stick it in one of the pockets of the swing, then insert the new vane, screw it in, and wah-lah! New weather vane!

PROBLEMS START: Well....did I mention that this all happens at the TOP OF THE MAST! You know those ah ha moments Oprah is always talking about? I had one of those...oh , about halfway up. I don't know if it was that huge pole between my legs or the fact that those little ripples of waves that you barely feel on deck seem to make the mast sway like that novelty bird that's filled with red juice, sipping from a water glass, then springing back in the other direction.
For those of you who know me, you know what happened next; I asked Paul if we could take a bathroom break.
Paul, of course said NO, because he claimed it was really hard to get me that far up and if I didn't look down, I'd be OK. Guys never want to stop to go to the restroom. What's up with that. So, I focused my mind on my ascent to the top of the mast. We we're all sweating bullets by the time I started my little job and reached into the pocket to get out the screwdriver . That went pretty well.

AND GROW: Then, it happened. As I reached up to remove the old vane, the new one somehow fell out of my pocket! As I saw it spiraling through the air, with Paul and Bill scurrying to catch it and finally….

OH NO: the ker-ploping sou nd it made as it plummeted into the bay. I knew this was not good.

THE OUTCOME: I was back on deck again before I knew it. Paul didn't talk to me for 3 days. I think he's pretty much over it now.

NOT SO BAD: The Frogman who cleans the barnacles off the bottom of the boat eventually found the weather vane, somewhere at the bottom of the Bay.. That helped.

CONCLUSION: So, you can see why it's best for all concerned, that when Lynda and I visit Paul down in Zih, we're staying in a resort, on land.

Simone